NOM

Just a few updates. Last week was a roller coaster week for me.

We welcomed a new nephew into the family - but I haven't seen him yet since they live far away.
Mrs Kori and I had some heart to heart communications that were rather difficult at times.
Some amazing friends came to visit Sunday evening and we had a great time with them (you know who you are)

We attend a local baptist congregation Sunday morning. The pastor goes to the same gym we attend and he's a nice guy and invited us. He had a special sermon on marriage. It was nice, and we saw several people there from the gym. Everyone was really welcoming and kind.

It's a bit odd attending a baptist style service after a lifetime in the LDS format. Being there made me realize how much of dill-weed I was when inviting people to my chruch, especially as a missionary. I don't know what to expect, I don't know the songs, etc. Of course everyone is nice, but there is an inherent awkwardness. Maybe they should make all missionaries attend another church service before going out so they understand what it's like.

Anyhow, I liked the service. It's an 75+/- minute service and they have a few other meetings if you're interested. If not, no problemo. So church is done in about 1.5 hours. Dress code is casual/come-as-you-are, so there isn't a 1 hour preparation requirement before start time. And if you want to stop at the grocery store afterwards - you won't go to hell for shopping on the sabbath. I still enjoy the idea of getting dressed up for church as a sign of reverence, but this sure does make like easier. I think an informal dress code helps in part to "Live your religion". If you worship in the same clothes as your live day to day, maybe you'll live your religion a bit easier. Admittedly, I think this same concept could to garments (gasp!).

But I could see myself getting on board with this if I had to choose a new congregation.

Also, last night we watched a couple youtube videos, including the Infants on Thrones video featuring Creep by Radiohead highlighting various GA quotes about their stance on the November policy and homosexuality as a whole. Mrs Kori said "Even if they (LDS church) have the Truth, it is a culture full of guilt and judgement and I don't want to raise my kids in that." She then said she felt the baptist group was completely different in not judging anyone and being much more welcoming.

So we are still at a crossroads of unknowns. Do we bail on religion altogether? Do we find a different congregation? Do we simmer in discontentment perpetually due to social ties?
Choices choices choices.

In one of the Mormon Expression podcasts, John Larson talked about how Mormons in UT, AZ, and ID have their civic life dominated by the LDS church and they think it is normal. When John moved his family to Virginia several years ago he discovered all of the civic activities that he could take his family to now that Mormon culture was not dominating evenings with activities, sports, and scouts. Virginia has plenty of activities, sports, and scouts for families because the LDS church was not the driving force there.

Areas with high LDS concentrations necessarily pull in lower tax revenue because the most diligent families have tithing deducted from income when determining taxes. Many cultural institutions are poorly funded unless the LDS church steps in. This is combined with the clear social cohesion of LDS units such that non-LDS based activities are more poorly supported. You have been in Utah and Arizona which has had this problem for more than a century. The LDS church has a system that simply does not work well with people who want to only be social members. Judaism is centuries ahead of the Mormons in having secular, liberal, and reform versions of congregations that are otherwise recognized as "Jewish" by Orthodox and Conservative congregations.

Answering the question of "how will we live?" has been the subject of philosophers since Plato's "The Republic" and obviously stretching back long before. But now you have to answer it for your own young family and it's really difficult to comprehend finding a new social group. I think you are moving in the right direction with trying a Baptist church. Having a social group outside of your home is a really good idea. Getting your children involved in sports, crafts, reading groups, and other non-church activities will also help guide you towards a new foundation of external family life.

Korihor wrote: ↑Mon Feb 13, 2017 9:10 am Mrs Kori said "Even if they (LDS church) have the Truth, it is a culture full of guilt and judgement and I don't want to raise my kids in that."

When is Mrs. Kori going to get a NOM account? We would love to hear from her.

I like what Corsair said about getting your kids involved in local sports programs and stuff like that. That is also a great way to make new friends and start to build a life outside of Mormonism. My DD is in Girl Scouts. She loves it, and I love working with all the other Girl Scout moms.

MoPag wrote: ↑Mon Feb 13, 2017 1:21 pm

Korihor wrote: ↑Mon Feb 13, 2017 9:10 am Mrs Kori said "Even if they (LDS church) have the Truth, it is a culture full of guilt and judgement and I don't want to raise my kids in that."

When is Mrs. Kori going to get a NOM account? We would love to hear from her.

I like what Corsair said about getting your kids involved in local sports programs and stuff like that. That is also a great way to make new friends and start to build a life outside of Mormonism. My DD is in Girl Scouts. She loves it, and I love working with all the other Girl Scout moms.

I wouldn't hold your breath for Mrs Kori showing up here, but I've been wrong plenty of times before. I was actually surprised when she that about the judgement culture, It's a significant change in her perspective and shows how far she's come.

We are working on getting kids involved in other in other activities, but it's been a slow transition. Although my physical disconnect from the church was slow, my mental disconnect was very fast. Mrs Kori is gradually disconnecting mentally and physically.