Turning Point

[NotKeepingQuiet]

Well, I did it. I told DS that I didn't care if he got married in the temple or not. For the last two months, he has been dating a wonderful, driven, intelligent, yet completely inactive woman. They seem to be a perfect fit for each other and I've never seen him happier. For years he had told himself that there was no one out there that he could share his life with....here he was, a RM who was not interested in dating a TBM girl or someone completely outside his faith tradition...which didn't leave too many options. Now, with this new woman, he has found someone who speaks Mormon but is definitely NOT TBM and is not interested in ever looking back.

DS has always been an exceptionally deep, spiritual thinker, who operated outside the box on his mission. He, DH and I are now pretty much on the same path, with one foot in the church and one foot out, still loving many tenants of the theology but finding the institution toxic and deadly boring. DH is still doing his best to row upstream as hard as he can and still has good feelings surrounding temple worship. I, on the other hand, have never had fond feelings about the endowment, but I've done an okay job keeping them to myself (with the exception of a few unrestrained outbursts on occasion).

I don't know who was more shocked to hear me say these words out loud, DS or I. It was the first time that I had ever allowed this sentiment to be articulated for someone else to hear.... and on one level, it made me heartsick. All these years of praying for all my children to have temple marriages, yet on the other hand, despising the origins infused with manipulation and secrecy. Still, I'm sad.....it feels like a death. DS and I both cried.

[2bizE]

Looking into the future, won't it be great for your son to have a marriage based on love and interests rather than just gospel beliefs. She sounds like a great addition and companion for your son.
Remember what the proclamation on the family says....marriage is ordained of God. Not just temple marriage.

[Silver Girl]

Looking into the future, won't it be great for your son to have a marriage based on love and interests rather than just gospel beliefs. She sounds like a great addition and companion for your son.
Remember what the proclamation on the family says....marriage is ordained of God. Not just temple marriage.

^^^^^ Agreed! ^^^^^

Not only that - all their loved ones, on both sides, can attend and celebrate that happy day with them. If there are friends or family members who aren't members, or are inactive & don't hold the entry ticket, nobody will be singled out or be conspicuous in their absence during the ceremony.

Speaking of which - the ceremony will be infinitely more meaningful, and more beautiful and spiritual in content. No overtones of who has ownership over the other. No ugly hats or robes covering what he or she decides to wear on that day.

Congratulations to all!