The Armpit Crab story

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Corsair
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The Armpit Crab story

Post by Corsair »

Perhaps many of you have wondered what crazy story lies at the far, far end of the LDS rabbit hole. It must be some story that stretches both reality and credulity and I am sorely unhappy to bring that story to you fine people this day.

Twitter Discusses Alleged 'Armpit Crabs' Epidemic At Bringham Young University

I am not at all pleased with myself that I admit a recognition of the tortured logic leading to an outbreak of body parasites at a religious university. It is an act of infernal irony that this phenoena exists at aninstitution named for a big fan of plural marriage. But ecclesiastical endorsements must be signed by someone with the affirmed ability to see all infractions of the law of chastity. In the hormonal minds of the young students this distinction between sanctioned and proper behavior has a huge swatch of no-man's land between the borders where much mischief occurs.
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RubinHighlander
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Location: Behind the Zion Curtain

Re: The Armpit Crab story

Post by RubinHighlander »

Oh my gird up your loins!
“Sir,' I said to the universe, 'I exist.' 'That,' said the universe, 'creates no sense of obligation in me whatsoever.”
--Douglas Adams

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YzmYP3PbfXE
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Hagoth
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Re: The Armpit Crab story

Post by Hagoth »

BYU just needs to have a purge day every semester. Do whatever you need to get it out of your system. God will look the other way for one day, then you can get back to your studies. Everyone would be better off for it.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."
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moksha
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Re: The Armpit Crab story

Post by moksha »

Soaking sounded like a delightful BYU story that spoke strongly of pent-up primal urges and LDS reasoning. This armpit sex sounds more like a BYU fetish gone awry.

Cougars, get back to your near-normal soaking and leave that armpit stuff to the French Foreign Legion.
Good faith does not require evidence, but it also does not turn a blind eye to that evidence. Otherwise, it becomes misplaced faith.
-- Moksha
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stealthbishop
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Re: The Armpit Crab story

Post by stealthbishop »

DW is very skeptical of "soaking", etc. and I also brought up this story as well and she dismissed it. I'm not sure if I should be more skeptical of it but I do tend to find it somewhat believable.
"Take second best
Put me to the test
Things on your chest
You need to confess"

-Depeche Mode
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Hagoth
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Re: The Armpit Crab story

Post by Hagoth »

stealthbishop wrote: Mon Oct 31, 2022 10:41 am DW is very skeptical of "soaking", etc. and I also brought up this story as well and she dismissed it. I'm not sure if I should be more skeptical of it but I do tend to find it somewhat believable.
Have you seen Alpha House on Amazon? The topic of soaking becomes a major component of the Utah Senator's daughter's love life. Hilarious.
“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.” -Mark Twain

Jesus: "The Kingdom of God is within you." The Buddha: "Be your own light."
hmb
Posts: 474
Joined: Tue Jan 03, 2017 6:43 am

Re: The Armpit Crab story

Post by hmb »

RubinHighlander wrote: Tue Oct 25, 2022 2:28 pm Oh my gird up your loins!
Maybe it's gird up your armpits. I wonder how one would do that?
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