I'm a prophet, damn it, not a weatherman!

[Hagoth]

Remember when everybody was finding out about Ensign Peak investments and asking why the church wasn't using that money to help people? Remember when the church said that money was set aside by the Lord for a rainy day?

Fast forward to this year when they lost billions in the faltering stock market.

Question: shouldn't someone with, I dunno, prophetic powers, have foreseen that the real rainy day would be a drop in the stock market, and that they could have done immeasurable good with that money if they had pulled it out of the market and put it toward worthy causes rather than gambling it away?

[moksha]

Doesn't the market always go up again?

[Red Ryder]

Jesus is my Lord and Investment Advisor!

[Hagoth]

Doesn't the market always go up again?

If the apocalypse is at our doorstep, as Nelson keeps hinting, the market will be the first thing to go. We never got to hear the parable about the servant who invested his talents in a market that came to an abrupt end when the world ended. This demonstrates that the church (a financial institution) does not believe the teachings of the church (an apocalyptic religion).

So what happens if Nelson's doomsday warnings are true? The church suddenly liquidates its soon-to-be-valueless investments into soon-to-be-valueless currency? Or maybe gold? God loves gold. He uses it like we use asphalt. He always made sure the Israelites took all of the gold after they slaughtered their neighbors. They even took the Egyptians' gold when they made their exodus. What exactly is gold good for if you're just going to be carrying it around in the desert for 40 years? Oh right, making calf idols.

Will we know the end is nigh when the church converts all of its investments into MREs, ammo and Greyhound tickets to Jackson County?

[nibbler]

Remember when everybody was finding out about Ensign Peak investments and asking why the church wasn't using that money to help people? Remember when the church said that money was set aside by the Lord for a rainy day?

That was awesome.

[Hagoth]

Remember when everybody was finding out about Ensign Peak investments and asking why the church wasn't using that money to help people? Remember when the church said that money was set aside by the Lord for a rainy day?

That was awesome.

[RubinHighlander]

It's kind of like living in Colorado city, just escape to one border or another to avoid inconveniences. Speaking like a man or a prophet. Acting like a for profit or non-profit, prophet vs non-prophet. But yeah, since the Heber J. Grant trying to find a grant days you would think they would have been smarter in the hear and now about how they invested all those tithing funds with the down swing. Maybe Ensign is just a distraction from some other really big pile of assets and holdings they are sitting on. I think there's more than a seer stone in that closet at the big white office building in SLC.

[Linked]

Will we know the end is nigh when the church converts all of its investments into MREs, ammo and Greyhound tickets to Jackson County?

Where's the trigger warning ? Flash back to my parents food storage room and some terrible camping dinners.

[Hagoth]

Maybe Ensign is just a distraction from some other really big pile of assets and holdings they are sitting on.

It's called the Sexual Assault Hush Money Fund.