NOM

Are you better off than you were four years ago? Why or why not? Do you think others are better or worse off than they were?

What metrics are we using here?

Is it better off financially, with family, emotionally, spiritually, etc?

Just curious - it's an interesting thought, but I wasn't sure if this was more church related of 2020 election related.

[TL;DR] Better, but that's because of my perspective and not because of my circumstances. I don't know about other people. I don't presume to speak for them.

My physical circumstances have not changed so much, but my attitude toward them has. When my company finally let us all telecommute and I was basking in the glow of feeling safer and doing my part to make others feel safer, I saw articles about the uptick in domestic violence calls. My first thought was "oh, that's right". Not, "yup". My ex telecommuted during the last seven years of our marriage. I know what it's like to have your abuser home 24/7/365. Back then, I was able to leave the house and I made it a point to, everyday. While I am sorry for those victims, there was nothing more I could do for them other than donate, which I have done. When I saw those stories, though, and I realized the brave and scary step I took in getting my children and myself free, when I realized the Hell my ward and bishop had put me through for that decision, when I remembered how most of my family had not been supportive, how my co-workers had marginalized me for that decision and now I had done what I needed to make sure my sons and me were safe, truly safe during the lock-down was a tremendously vindicating and validating moment for me. It took seven goddamned years, but it finally came!

One of the best decisions I made was to formally go inactive and tell my bishop I wanted no contact until I reached out to them. I did this back around the time my ex asked for a sealing clearance and Sam Young was excommunicated (my ex has since divorced). Both those events told me that I am not wanted in the church and that the church will always shaft me and reward my ex. Of course my bishop hasn't respected my request and I just let that tell me I've made the right decision. However, shortly before the lock down, I received five separate contacts from the bishop trying to fellowship me. When they asked for me to tell them how I truly was doing, I sent an email basically telling them what I wrote in the previous paragraph without the profanity.

I am finding that due to my hearing loss, I have actually become a bit of a resource as people are discovering it's difficult to communicate through masks. I am currently making a video that I will be sharing with work with some tools people can use to facilitate communication with masks.

I have taken some amazing trips to Estes Park, Saint George, Las Vegas, Paris, Hong Kong, Singapore and Busan. I have a large body and came to embrace and be grateful for this large body as it is. I shook hands with the fact that all my weight loss efforts over the years have actually been counterproductive and I have simply decided to eat reasonably, move reasonably and let my body be the weight it wants to be. I will throw in there that this highly imperfect body that incites all kinds of fat phobia in people who's gaze happens to go in my direction has gotten me around that list of amazing places that started this paragraph and I expect it to continue to do amazing things as it gets me through this pandemic.

My therapist finally helped me to find a spiritual practice that works for me. That was a major thing that kept me from moving on after my shelf fell. [Later addition] I finally have some people in my real life who don't have testimonies: two co-workers, my cousin and an old friend from high school.

I bought a really sweet car a couple of years ago. It is a red Honda Civic Coupe and I really kind of want to marry it. I don't like that I still have to pay for it, but since travel is really off the table for me and I am more or less confined to my home for the foreseeable future, that car is a source of fun to take me on small adventures and I am grateful for it.

I am immune compromised due to being born with 1/3 less lung function because I was premature, my asthma, my body size and I am closer to 65 than I am to 35. My world has shrunk considerably and many of the plans I was making either need to be put on hold or re-shaped. My home is paid for, though, and could use some loving attention. Same goes for my garden and yard and those are going to be my major projects for the next couple of years.


Do you think others are better or worse off than they were? I don't know. You'll have to ask them.

jfro18 wrote: ↑Sun May 31, 2020 5:54 pm What metrics are we using here?

Is it better off financially, with family, emotionally, spiritually, etc?

Just curious - it's an interesting thought, but I wasn't sure if this was more church related of 2020 election related.

However you choose, but please share your rationale for why you feel things are better or worse...or which things are worse and which are better. It stems from a question originally asked by Ronald Reagan, but I am curious because it seems like the news is very bad in the world. How do individuals feel they are faring? Does the bad news constantly in our faces match our personal experiences?

Financially, we took a big hit and then the stock market crashed and we took another hit. So, in retirement, financial hits when you are partially living off what is in the bank, are scary.

But, we have a good life, with two (small) houses paid for, and we are snow birds, so we avoid both the snow my husband hates, and the heat that causes significant neuropathy pain in my feet. Getting older and feeling it.

All three kids still have jobs and the two safest from corona are working from home, with spouses working from home, and the one who is immunosuppressed and has something that the doctors can’t quite figure out is terrified of going back to work, but her job can’t be done by telecommuting.

My husband really goes stir crazy having to stay home so much and I miss being with the kids and grand kids. But we sat on the deck overlooking Bear Lake today and watched blue birds, humming birds, rabbits and deer, so can’t beat that kind of staying home.

As far as the state of the nation and world go, we are half joking about moving to New Zealand.