Just a rant about family
Posted: Mon Jun 18, 2018 3:55 pm
This is long overdue, so long overdue that I don’t even know where to start or what to say.
When I got married, I liked my in-laws. I cannot stand them anymore.
Part of It is me. I know I’ve changed, although I always had this sneaky suspicion that I’d run into problems with them when I had kids, and wow is that becoming evident.
But they’ve changed too. They’ve become more judgmental, divisive, pious, conservative. My BIL calls it something like a religious bender, so I know it isn’t just me. And it’s driving my husband nuts too. They’ve been kind of rude to him recently, but of course, not overtly. All three women and my FIL are presidents of quorums/auxiliaries – it’s stifling. Last year FIL patronizingly told me, “Don’t worry MerrieMiss, someday you’ll be a RS president too.” Hell no. And then they all complain they don’t have any time to do anything.
This last weekend I had to spend two days with them. We skipped church to spend Sunday with them and I am not exaggerating when I say I wished I’d gone to all three hours of church then gone home to my own house. I’d even have given a talk and participated in GD. I’d have shared a special experience in RS, but please don’t make me spend more than one day in a row with those people ever again.
I don’t really want to bore people with the details. Most of you probably have similar families, so you know what I’m talking about. We sit around and talk about callings, pick apart the handbook, talk about who isn’t living a covenant keeping life, gossip about ward members I have never met, moralize about how much better we are than everyone else, how without the priesthood babies don’t have real names, bearing testimony over the food, and on and on.
The passive aggressive behavior. My husband wonders if I’m reading into things too much, but I don’t think so. The women in that family have some power issues.No, it's not just the women. The whole family is passive aggressive, and that's bothered me for a long time. And his dad is what I call a “passive patriarch” in that he isn’t overt or aggressive in his preaching, but underhanded and guilt tripping and moralizing.
And we all have to sit there, with Mom-and-Dad-in-law, staring at each other, because if we try to go on a walk or get up and do something different, then we aren’t being a family. If this is the celestial kingdom my friends, I don’t want any part of it, because it’s bloody hell, let me tell you.
When I got married, I liked my in-laws. I cannot stand them anymore.
Part of It is me. I know I’ve changed, although I always had this sneaky suspicion that I’d run into problems with them when I had kids, and wow is that becoming evident.
But they’ve changed too. They’ve become more judgmental, divisive, pious, conservative. My BIL calls it something like a religious bender, so I know it isn’t just me. And it’s driving my husband nuts too. They’ve been kind of rude to him recently, but of course, not overtly. All three women and my FIL are presidents of quorums/auxiliaries – it’s stifling. Last year FIL patronizingly told me, “Don’t worry MerrieMiss, someday you’ll be a RS president too.” Hell no. And then they all complain they don’t have any time to do anything.
This last weekend I had to spend two days with them. We skipped church to spend Sunday with them and I am not exaggerating when I say I wished I’d gone to all three hours of church then gone home to my own house. I’d even have given a talk and participated in GD. I’d have shared a special experience in RS, but please don’t make me spend more than one day in a row with those people ever again.
I don’t really want to bore people with the details. Most of you probably have similar families, so you know what I’m talking about. We sit around and talk about callings, pick apart the handbook, talk about who isn’t living a covenant keeping life, gossip about ward members I have never met, moralize about how much better we are than everyone else, how without the priesthood babies don’t have real names, bearing testimony over the food, and on and on.
The passive aggressive behavior. My husband wonders if I’m reading into things too much, but I don’t think so. The women in that family have some power issues.No, it's not just the women. The whole family is passive aggressive, and that's bothered me for a long time. And his dad is what I call a “passive patriarch” in that he isn’t overt or aggressive in his preaching, but underhanded and guilt tripping and moralizing.
And we all have to sit there, with Mom-and-Dad-in-law, staring at each other, because if we try to go on a walk or get up and do something different, then we aren’t being a family. If this is the celestial kingdom my friends, I don’t want any part of it, because it’s bloody hell, let me tell you.
