Saturday Morning NOMference Thread!!!!

[MoPag]

-1000 for saying that Joseph knew he had to find the true church to gain forgiveness.

No, make that -10,000.

Yes!! That is a really toxic message.

[græy]

Eyring: -10 for preaching scare satan's influence

[DPRoberts]

Eyring: -10 for preaching scare satan's influence

Beat me to it. Ditto that -10.

[græy]

JC: 36
JS: 41
N: 26

Much closer than I would have thought.

[Hagoth]

Who are Satan's assistants that are trying to stop him from praying? How are they doing it?

[MoPag]

JC: 36
JS: 41
N: 26

Much closer than I would have thought.

Right? Thanks so much for doing this Grey. Like so many things in my life, I make plans and never really think things through.

[Reuben]

-1000 for saying that Joseph knew he had to find the true church to gain forgiveness.

No, make that -10,000.

Yes!! That is a really toxic message.

Is that something JS even said, or did he pull that idea out of his hoo-haw?

[MoPag]

So we've cut to commercials
Not sure when we are doing the hanky shout.

[MoPag]

-1000 for saying that Joseph knew he had to find the true church to gain forgiveness.

No, make that -10,000.

Yes!! That is a really toxic message.

Is that something JS even said, or did he pull that idea out of his hoo-haw?

Yep. I don't think JS really gave a sh!t about repentance.

[lostinmiddlemormonism]

My notes and observations:

Joseph Smith - 57
Jesus Christ - 29
Rusty Nelson - 32
Other GA's - 20

Nelson's Talk - +10 for using "even" correctly in a sentence
Ballard - -100 for Joseph Smith Worship, +10 for mentioning multiple accounts, -20 for not mentioning any discrepancies in those accounts
Nepotistic Rasband - -100 for Nepotism, +100 for a Christ centered talk. +50 for the best talk of conference
Joy Jones - Meh...
Brother Neil - -200 for Rusty Worship, -200 Glasses sink - they don't float, -100 for making sure to quote every 1st presidency member
Dough Holmes - Meh, -10 for GA hero worship
Crying Eyring - exactly how far is his tongue up Rusy's ass? +10 for making it more than 2 minutes without crying.

-lost

[græy]

So we've cut to commercials
Not sure when we are doing the hanky shout.

When he said it, I thought it was COB tomorrow. I could be wrong though.

[MoPag]

So we've cut to commercials
Not sure when we are doing the hanky shout.

When he said it, I thought it was COB tomorrow. I could be wrong though.

That makes more sense. It just cut to world report.

I'm taking a break.

[græy]

DW is not happy that I was posting on here during GC.

She won't talk to me about church things, and apparently I'm not allowed to take to any of you either.

[græy]

So we've cut to commercials
Not sure when we are doing the hanky shout.

When he said it, I thought it was COB tomorrow. I could be wrong though.

That makes more sense. It just cut to world report.

I'm taking a break.

Thanks for doing this MoPag! I so need this community for this.

[lostinmiddlemormonism]

My "spiritually defining book of memories" includes the CES Letter and MormonThink.

love

[DPRoberts]

I'm going to give the session a +20 for the closing hymn. It also should earn some Jesus points since it is the most Christ centered hymn in the COJCOLDS catalog.

That hymn is not in the current hymnbook, and I suspect that is because the Bruce R. McHardA faction didn't like a hymn about grace and used their influence to get rid of it. It was in the old hymnbook I grew up with. I give Mack the Wilberg credit for keeping that hymn alive with this arrangement. If only they would have used the orchestra. The organ just can't pull off that crescendo into the last verse like a symphony orchestra can.

[Random]

I am literally making popcorn in hopes that something interesting will be said today.

Yum. Good idea.

It even looked like they moved over some big red chairs for them to sit in at six feet apart. Got to have their big red chairs.

They're old. Their bones can't handle anything but the cushy chairs. (Okay, it's probably more for the fact that kings and rulers and gods get ultra plush red seats, but I still think they'd be squirming in their seats if they got anything less because they are used to elite living.)

How many points do you give a 20-minute nonstop Joseph monologue?

I feel like 1 point per minute... what say ye NOMs?

Works for me.

I remember this Hosana shout as a temple only ceremony, much too sacred to let just anyone participate. So, now they are going to broadcast what is a temple type ceremony over television?

That's exactly what I was thinking. Any ol' apostate or inactive or unworthy or even non member can watch this.

[Random]

What's the Joseph/Jesus count up to now?

So, Im struggling with how to count this. The whole talk is about Joseph Smith. Does that only count once? Or once per paragraph?

Lets say a solid talk on one of the them gets 20 points.

Much easier to compute.

[alas]

Do we get to give Joseph worship points for all the advertisements for books and movies about “Young Joseph” and such because I have seen ads for about three different versions. Over and over, every time I look up from my video game.

[Random]

Hey! I was told I was the greatest generation, by Hinckley! What's going on?

Well, I was told it in the 1970s by whoever was prophet then, and that's the generation when Saturday's Warrior was written to prove it!