A place to love and accept the people who think about and live Mormonism on their own terms.
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I suppose you'd just have to trust me. I think you'd be satisfied. If you leave my house dry, it's your own damn fault.Just This Guy wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 10:02 am
I know how it goes. You'll drink it all the night before, so when I come over, it's 10% of nothing.
What else is off here is just the way the voluntelling is done. When I text my housecleaner, whom I pay very well, I still ask more politely than this. "Hey [name]. I hope all is well! Just reaching out to confirm our appointment for Wednesday, let me know if you are still available." Etc. I cannot imagine saying, "it is your responsibility to find a replacement..." If she can't do it, I get to find a replacement myself or do it myself...lostinmiddlemormonism wrote: ↑Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:26 pm Moksha you are hereby assigned to come and shovel my driveway this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
MoPag you are hereby assigned to do my dishes this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
Wtfluff you are hereby assigned to wash my car this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
Linked you are hereby assigned to vacuum my house this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
Red Ryder you are hereby assigned clean out my basement this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
Hagoth you are hereby assigned to dispose of my trash this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
Seriously! Who thinks this is going to work? Why do they think it is going to work at the local burlap building? Because people actually do it. If you do it because you want to...great. If you do it out of some sense of obligation, requirement, or social pressure (the vast majority probably) then that is something else.
-lost
This is a really good point. The way voluntelling is done feels wrong. I'm not sure if disrespectful is the right word, but something like it. We had a fathers and sons camp at the heber valley camp and the way they told us to clean was off-putting. I am happy to help and generally do more than my share at events like that, but I do it because it makes me feel good. The work required for not disappointing them is very specific and they make it clear that they are going to make sure you do what they tell you to (they gave each car a voucher to get past the entry shack after inspecting cabins and campsites). That takes away the intrinsic reward and makes helping suck.Thoughtful wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 1:26 pm What else is off here is just the way the voluntelling is done. When I text my housecleaner, whom I pay very well, I still ask more politely than this. "Hey [name]. I hope all is well! Just reaching out to confirm our appointment for Wednesday, let me know if you are still available." Etc. I cannot imagine saying, "it is your responsibility to find a replacement..." If she can't do it, I get to find a replacement myself or do it myself...
I think "condescending" is the right word.Linked wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 2:11 pmThis is a really good point. The way voluntelling is done feels wrong. I'm not sure if disrespectful is the right word, but something like it.Thoughtful wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 1:26 pm What else is off here is just the way the voluntelling is done. When I text my housecleaner, whom I pay very well, I still ask more politely than this. "Hey [name]. I hope all is well! Just reaching out to confirm our appointment for Wednesday, let me know if you are still available." Etc. I cannot imagine saying, "it is your responsibility to find a replacement..." If she can't do it, I get to find a replacement myself or do it myself...
Yes. Condescending is perfect. My ward is pretty good too, though there is an occasional email or announcement that voluntells people.Reuben wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 6:04 pmI think "condescending" is the right word.Linked wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 2:11 pmThis is a really good point. The way voluntelling is done feels wrong. I'm not sure if disrespectful is the right word, but something like it.Thoughtful wrote: ↑Wed Jan 23, 2019 1:26 pm What else is off here is just the way the voluntelling is done. When I text my housecleaner, whom I pay very well, I still ask more politely than this. "Hey [name]. I hope all is well! Just reaching out to confirm our appointment for Wednesday, let me know if you are still available." Etc. I cannot imagine saying, "it is your responsibility to find a replacement..." If she can't do it, I get to find a replacement myself or do it myself...
Mormons tend to think of the church as a parent, and act accordingly. I've noticed that this is slowly changing (it used to be that refusing a calling for any reason made you a heretic), but there's still a long way to go.
YMMV depending on geography. The ward in my area is actually quite good at not voluntelling.
Found a replacement and this guy likes wintery outdoor weather.lostinmiddlemormonism wrote: ↑Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:26 pm Moksha you are hereby assigned to come and shovel my driveway this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
I will feel horribly guilty if I don't do this and I will beat myself up about it for years. I fear that other NOM members hear that I turned down a calling they will gossip about me.lostinmiddlemormonism wrote: ↑Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:26 pm Hagoth you are hereby assigned to dispose of my trash this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
moksha wrote: ↑Thu Jan 24, 2019 2:50 pmFound a replacement and this guy likes wintery outdoor weather.lostinmiddlemormonism wrote: ↑Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:26 pm Moksha you are hereby assigned to come and shovel my driveway this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
Meet Elder Whitewalker
Stale bread and warm water served in miniature cups. Only one apiece now people...Hagoth wrote: ↑Thu Jan 24, 2019 7:51 pmI will feel horribly guilty if I don't do this and I will beat myself up about it for years. I fear that other NOM members hear that I turned down a calling they will gossip about me.lostinmiddlemormonism wrote: ↑Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:26 pm Hagoth you are hereby assigned to dispose of my trash this week. If you cannot make it, it is your responsibility to find a replacement.
But more importantly, will there be snacks?