NOM

Red Ryder wrote: ↑Tue Sep 19, 2017 10:19 am Can you get excommunicated for making fun of an apostles wife?

Here's David and Susan on their honeymoon!

Funny, but there's a thread that started over on MD&D about the Bednars and I googled trying to find a young picture of Susan. I could find none which is just kind of odd. I can find pictures of every other apostle and his wife at a young age (that I've searched for).

Here is a clip from a Q&A that is cringe worthy:

https://youtu.be/1CR7XxgiJXQ?t=5220

Listen to how she responds when he's done with telling everyone how beautiful she was as a young woman, but is an "elderly woman" now and her beauty is no longer on the outside....she goes into how "we can all pray every day..." ....so robotic. Also, he is the same age as she is....he must think he's still a young rock-star or something!

She's an enigma to google.

I can't find any pictures of her without David by her side or her behind the pulpit.

I even googled "Sister Bednar naked" (don't judge) and I'll I got was this:

I've never had the hots for her. Not even once.

I've got that she's an accomplished pianist. Her maiden name is Susan Kae Robinson. Couldn't turn up any photos.

I'll tell you why I want to find pictures of her when she was young. It means that she was someone before him. That there is some record of Susan Kae Robinson before she became Elder Bednar's wife.

I hate to be a party pooper, but I am not comfortable with the speculation regarding how abusive Elder and Sister Bednar's relationship is, and I am certainly not comfortable with the mockery of someone's spouse. Think of what a questioning TBM might feel on stumbling onto this site and seeing this thread: "yeah, those antis are just as rude, disrespectful and demeaning as I was told in Church".

Elder Bednar has done plenty of documented, verified stuff that paints him in an unflattering light - we really don't need all of this guesswork. We have plenty enough to know he isn't a servant of Christ without making him into an abusive husband when he might not be.

Damn, I hate being the guy who sticks up for Elder Bednar, I really can't stand the guy...

Not Buying It wrote: ↑Tue Sep 19, 2017 9:14 pm
Elder Bednar has done plenty of documented, verified stuff that paints him in an unflattering light - we really don't need all of this guesswork. We have plenty enough to know he isn't a servant of Christ without making him into an abusive husband when he might not be.

Okay. Let's just focus on Susan.

When I went through my faith transition I had a lot of anger for her. She would chastise and body-shame us all the time at BYUI. She was one of the people who spoon fed me the rape-culture lies and the twisted gender stereotypes that kept me in an abusive marriage. This thread and the other thread with the video of the Bednar fireside, are helping me see her in a different light. She is a human being after all. And the reason she was feeding me those lies is because someone had fed them to her. And the reason she loved to shame us might have been because she was shamed at our age or someone was shaming her. Now I feel pity much more than anger when I think about her. I would like to know more about her.

Why can't we find her?

This is the most info I've been able to gather on her: http://library.byui.edu/exhibits/Presidents/bednar.html

She is from Star Valley WY. I'm trying to search High school year books but my work internet keeps blocking me.

Some other things I remember from BYUI, she had really difficult pregnancies and ended up hospitalized with each one (she has 3 sons). She likes to shop at Eddie Bauer. Her grandma lived in Rexburg.

MoPag wrote: ↑Wed Sep 20, 2017 10:33 am

Not Buying It wrote: ↑Tue Sep 19, 2017 9:14 pm Elder Bednar has done plenty of documented, verified stuff that paints him in an unflattering light - we really don't need all of this guesswork. We have plenty enough to know he isn't a servant of Christ without making him into an abusive husband when he might not be.

Okay. Let's just focus on Susan.

...snip...

I would like to know more about her.

Why can't we find her?

You're right NBI, there's no point in speculating regarding abuse. However, I think the thread sort of drifted away from that fairly quickly and we started to focus on Susan as David's shadow. She's obviously tied to him for eternity but I couldn't find anything that seperated her from him in this life. Not surprisingly. How many members of the church even know the names of the apostles wives? Maybe the mormon muffins calendar guy can do a 2018 special apostle wife edition? Then we can at least learn their names.

This thread, while full of mocking inuendo, demonstrates the disturbing nature of women in the church. They become invisible, one trick children raising pony's, superceded by their husbands priesthood and callings. In googling for Susan, I saw picture after picture after picture of her standing behind David Bednar supporting his apostle ego and his hair. She doesn't exist as an individual.

I think any questioning TBM that comes to this site needs to see this pattern because it's abundantly clear that it is sewn into the fabric of Mormonism.

Red Ryder wrote: ↑Wed Sep 20, 2017 11:43 am

MoPag wrote: ↑Wed Sep 20, 2017 10:33 am

Not Buying It wrote: ↑Tue Sep 19, 2017 9:14 pm Elder Bednar has done plenty of documented, verified stuff that paints him in an unflattering light - we really don't need all of this guesswork. We have plenty enough to know he isn't a servant of Christ without making him into an abusive husband when he might not be.

Okay. Let's just focus on Susan.

...snip...

I would like to know more about her.

Why can't we find her?

You're right NBI, there's no point in speculating regarding abuse. However, I think the thread sort of drifted away from that fairly quickly and we started to focus on Susan as David's shadow. She's obviously tied to him for eternity but I couldn't find anything that seperated her from him in this life. Not surprisingly. How many members of the church even know the names of the apostles wives? Maybe the mormon muffins calendar guy can do a 2018 special apostle wife edition? Then we can at least learn their names.

This thread, while full of mocking inuendo, demonstrates the disturbing nature of women in the church. They become invisible, one trick children raising pony's, superceded by their husbands priesthood and callings. In googling for Susan, I saw picture after picture after picture of her standing behind David Bednar supporting his apostle ego and his hair. She doesn't exist as an individual.

I think any questioning TBM that comes to this site needs to see this pattern because it's abundantly clear that it is sewn into the fabric of Mormonism.

This is where I am. That's why I wrote what I did in my long post, believe it or not. I have entertained the idea. Statistically, it's possible. After that, so what? If any of the apostles wives are abused, it is their business and not ours how they take it from there. I would say the same for any person.

There are people who stay in abusive relationships for their own reasons and I respect that decision. That's why, when I followed those thoughts, I realized that even if one or more of them is being abused, they really are quite stuck. I did join in the mocking for a bit, but since it's been pointed out that information on Sister Bednar from her younger years, let alone a photograph, are scant to non-existent. I can't even turn up a wedding picture or picture from their wedding day. That's why I clicked on the thread, today. I was hoping someone had unearthed more information on her. Even though she is apparently in lock step with her husband's views, I would still like to know more about her and the other apostles' wives as individual human beings.

I'll take back my speculations about abuse, even though they were trying to illustrate that any abused woman in that position is essentially stuck and such speculation about their marriage is only fruitful if it leads to prayers on their behalf, compassion in their presence and behind their backs and offering support to the DV survivors within the church in our lives. I'll also take back my light-hearted, but mean-spirited comment about the parachute.

I'm keeping my concern and genuine interest to know her and other apostles' wives better. I still think the apostles wives should be paid. That one stands.