I may be on the radar, but it's okay cause I'm now good at saying No

[sparky]

Hey all, just popping in for a bit of support. It seems I may be on the radar for outreach efforts after basically "quiet quitting" church over the last couple of years. I've turned down callings and talk assignments, and I didn't renew my temple recommend last year for the first time ever.

And all of that feels great. I go to support spouse on Sundays and I don't like it but I'm fine with that now that I don't feel pressure to participate.

But I just got an email from the ward secretary saying that the bishop had told him that I'd mentioned I wanted to speak with Bishop about renewing my recommend, and am I available to meet on Tuesday?

That's... Not true. I haven't requested any meetings about anything much less a recommend, nor do I plan to ever again. I am taking the charitable reading that either he mixed me up with someone else who actually did request a meeting, or the bishop said that HE (the bishop) wanted to talk to me, and the secretary just misheard and thought the request came from me.

At any rate, I have gotten good at declining these sorts of things. I used to have anxiety over it all day, take forever trying to figure out how to turn it down without "outing" myself as a troubled soul or whatever. But now I've built up my own self-security enough that I don't care what they think, and I actually enjoy standing up for myself.

So I fired off a quick reply saying that there had probably been a miscommunication or mix-up because I'm not interested in renewing. But I will reach out if I ever am again! (For example, if they turn the temples into libraries open to all, and the recommend becomes just a library card you sign up for). (I didn't say that last part).

Anyway, it feels great to know where I stand and have the confidence to stand there. My interest in temples has been at zero for years, but it's quickly going negative with the constant, constant begging of members to go, and the constant flowery rhetoric of it being the best most important place in the universe, and the church bullying their way into building them everywhere.

No thanks!

[Hagoth]

That was the perfect way to respond. Good for you. Isn't it wonderful to realize the only power they have is their assumption that you believe they have power over you? Once that assumption loses traction the assumed power vanishes.