I’ve wanted to come out to rest of the family about my change in beliefs and I typed up a “coming out” email and sent it to my brother to read. I told him how much I wanted to give my public support for him, for his significant other who he lives with, and his desire to adopt a child together with his companion. He loved the letter and the approach I took, but we both talked that I probably won’t send it anytime soon (or probably ever) and that it would be best to just talk face to face with individual family members if the subject were to come up.
I agreed with him, but still told him that just typing up what I wanted to say and sending it to someone in the family I knew would read it was cathartic. It also solidifies at least some of the things in my own mind that I would say if the topic were to come up with another family member.
We talked about how ridiculous it is that beliefs about religion create so many roadblocks to people’s relationships. As if there aren’t enough issues in relationships already. I told him that I would try my best to support him when I talk to our parents and they bring things up about him. The questions I want to ask them are: why do you let religious beliefs get in the way of a better relationship with your son? Would Jesus want you to distance any of your children from your love and acceptance?
I told him how much things still pain me between some of the things my wife says and thinks about me. A few weeks ago she basically said I was like Korihor, although if she meant the person on here that goes by Korihor, I’m fine with that
, that I’ve lost the spirit, that I’m too cynical. She still sees me as broken and she dismisses my concerns. She has been somewhat more “preachy” the last month.I’m still torn about what to tell our kids. DW still doesn’t want me to say anything. I’ve talked with them that they don’t have to say they “know” in order to have a testimony, and they did hear my own testimony last month in Sacrament. In my testimony I said nothing about Joseph Smith, nothing about the Book of Mormon, nothing about current prophets and apostles, nothing specific to the church at all.
For now, my brother and I have each other. We can have our own therapy sessions anytime one of us is having a hard time. Honestly, I don’t know that I could have coped with everything for this long without him.
