My 8 year olds faith crisis

[Give-me-strength]

My daughter was just baptized this past Saturday. In therapy today (she has a lot of anxiety, so we go for that) she told her therapist she has been praying to feel the spirit, and she hasn’t felt it yet. She said “god hasn’t answered any prayers.”

As we were driving away, I had to tell her that I have never had an answer, and that I think the Holy Ghost is made up and it’s really just our own brains. She said she wants to wait til she’s a teenager before deciding (which I encouraged not making any big decisions).

Anyway, this makes me regret my decision to let her be baptized even more. It was hard enough when I thought she was “happy” being baptized but now I know it’s caused her even more distress.

Anyway, at least she’s Years ahead of me in realizing that maybe it’s a bunch of phooey.

[Wonderment]

It's great that you are discussing these issues with her and are alleviating her anxiety. Communication between parent and child is so important where the church is involved.
I wish that my own parents had allowed me to have these open-ended, reflective conversations with them. I grew up thinking there was something terribly wrong with me because I was the only one who never felt as if God were talking to me or felt promptings from the spirit. -- Wndr.

[Wonderment]

Sorry - double post.

[Hermey]

<snip>

Anyway, at least she’s Years ahead of me in realizing that maybe it’s a bunch of phooey.

My youngest son started voicing his lack of belief (let’s call it his bullshit detector) at age 10. He resigned at 14 yrs.

There’s hope....

[Hagoth]

Lots of people feel like God is talking to them. Some of them commit atrocities or make terrible life choices. There doesn't seem to be a good litmus test for the genuine voice of God, so maybe silence from on high is the best thing to aspire to.

[Corsair]

My daughter was just baptized this past Saturday. In therapy today (she has a lot of anxiety, so we go for that) she told her therapist she has been praying to feel the spirit, and she hasn’t felt it yet. She said “god hasn’t answered any prayers.”

I would arrogantly try to give her two pieces of advice. First, keep talking to you as her parent. I am certainly confident with the introspection and understanding you are bringing to this situation.

Second, don't bring up this idea in Primary or Sunday School because the full weight of LDS social pressure will be leveled against her if she does.

[deacon blues]

My daughter was just baptized this past Saturday. In therapy today (she has a lot of anxiety, so we go for that) she told her therapist she has been praying to feel the spirit, and she hasn’t felt it yet. She said “god hasn’t answered any prayers.”

I would arrogantly try to give her two pieces of advice. First, keep talking to you as her parent. I am certainly confident with the introspection and understanding you are bringing to this situation.

Second, don't bring up this idea in Primary or Sunday School because the full weight of LDS social pressure will be leveled against her if she does.

1+ When I was about 8 or 9 I prayed to find a lost ball, and never found it. I think it occurred to me even then that maybe God didn't answer prayers; but it also occurred to me that I shouldn't tell people about this. Maybe because one rarely hears LDS people talk about God not answering prayers until one is older and "mature enough" to handle this "fact." I think even then I somehow sensed that God could be like Santa, who I also learned about around the same age. If we grew up hearing: "gee, God didn't answer that prayer I prayed last week, or last year", then young people would feel more comfortable talking about what they really think and not what the culture expects them to think. I think this is very subtle, perhaps bordering on abuse. Am I overstating it?