General Konference Predictions

[Kishkumen]

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[2bizE]

I would've sworn the mission length was a rumor last October and people were claiming their calls were on hold until conference and then nothing happened.

But as has been stated a bunch of times - if this was really happening we'd have screenshots of the calls floating around and yet there are none.

I'd be surprised if they dropped the length for men to 18 months, but maybe they'll do something like make it an option... that way they don't have to feel like they've completely caved to a generation that just isn't sticking around for the church's BS like the ones before it.

I did a quick search last week on Reddit and found folks on the Latter Day Saint forum talking about this last October.

[Kishkumen]

A new rumor - guaranteed fresh and unique!!!

I heard from a friend of a friend of GA's assistant of someone in the same ward as.... you get the idea. So this is totally unsubstantiated, however, I think this is a good rumor and it almost passes the sniff test "Hey, this is actually in the realm of possibilities".

It goes something like this: If you think there are a lot of temples now, in 5 years they could more than double the number of temples. RMN is busy working on some new ideas and said "add a zero to the number of current temples".

My first reaction was WTH? Temples take many years to plan and build and dedicate. The TBM's might not be aware, but most of us are painfully aware that temples are very expensive and patron attendance is less than ideal. They could never double the number of temples with current practices in 5 years. That's exactly the point - they wouldn't do it with current practices. RMN is getting creative.

They already have approximately 2000+ buildings spread throughout the world that help get them to double the number of temples (or more) - Stake Centers. They could do some remodelling and dedicate part of a stake center to perform some of the responsibility of temples. Stake Centers are already interpreted as a satellite temple location when dedicating a temple. They already have a baptismal font. Many Stakes Centers are becoming underutilized.

It seems to make sense to me that this is in the realm of possibilities, much more so than allowing coffee or tea. They could give the appearance of ongoing revelation, spark interest in local meetinghouses with the remodels and ease the travel burdens on people with large geographic distances.

[Rob4Hope]

He had one client in trouble with his bishop for not wearing Gs properly because of his colonostomy bag.

Alas...I have to say this jumped off the page at me. This is so totally nuts...I mean 'out there wacko nuts!'.

I agree with the rest of your post; meaning, there will not be overt changes--just slow meandering changes that will be introduced slowly, carefully, cunningly, to fool people into believing 'its always been this way.'

There is no way, IMHO, they can change the WoW at this point overtly, allowing for coffee. Tea has been a tricky one for a while, and it depends on 'leadership roulette' how that is handled.

The garment thing?...we shall see.

IF ANYONE IS READING THIS THREAD out there in a pilot ward where some of these things are being 'introduced',...though quietly,.... please post and share your knowledge.....

[no1saint]

A new rumor - guaranteed fresh and unique!!!

I heard from a friend of a friend of GA's assistant of someone in the same ward as.... you get the idea. So this is totally unsubstantiated, however, I think this is a good rumor and it almost passes the sniff test "Hey, this is actually in the realm of possibilities".

It goes something like this: If you think there are a lot of temples now, in 5 years they could more than double the number of temples. RMN is busy working on some new ideas and said "add a zero to the number of current temples".

My first reaction was WTH? Temples take many years to plan and build and dedicate. The TBM's might not be aware, but most of us are painfully aware that temples are very expensive and patron attendance is less than ideal. They could never double the number of temples with current practices in 5 years. That's exactly the point - they wouldn't do it with current practices. RMN is getting creative.

They already have approximately 2000+ buildings spread throughout the world that help get them to double the number of temples (or more) - Stake Centers. They could do some remodelling and dedicate part of a stake center to perform some of the responsibility of temples. Stake Centers are already interpreted as a satellite temple location when dedicating a temple. They already have a baptismal font. Many Stakes Centers are becoming underutilized.

It seems to make sense to me that this is in the realm of possibilities, much more so than allowing coffee or tea. They could give the appearance of ongoing revelation, spark interest in local meetinghouses with the remodels and ease the travel burdens on people with large geographic distances.

This is the most logical solution. The chapel could convert easily into the celestial room, the overflow room between chapel and rec hall could covert into a veil room and the rec hall could be partitioned off to create a two stage ordinance rooms. Plenty of auxiliary rooms for changeing rooms, brides rooms and sealing rooms as well as offices.

[Just This Guy]

While I understand the logic of some way to convert stake centers to have temple functionality, my mind goes to what is the cost impact for the church's real estate holdings?

When a temples goes into an area, it almost always raises surrounding property values. This is something that members have basically done insider trading with real estate a number of times and several members have gotten into trouble this way. Could the idea of using SC's as temples be a way to try to increase land values for the many existing properties that the church already owns? I could see the idea being that if it works, the church could make a huge amount of money from real estate speculation.

The other way of looking would be by tithing revenue generally goes up when a temple comes into an area. How better to extract tithing by putting a temple in every stake?

Temples are purely there as a means to make money. Whether it's through manipulating land value, or extracting tithing from members for the exclusive cub card (recommend) .

[A New Name]

Lots of “unintended consequences” turning Stake Centers into part time chapels. Nobody is going to want to get married in a stake center! So they will have to also stop doing weddings in temples (rumor number 7.b)

Then there is the problem of staffing the big temples they have now. They are always begging for temple working for the LA Temple (that’s Los Angeles, not Louisiana). It is a one to two hour drive from where I live to that temple. It is a 20 min drive to the SC. They would have to restrict the SC temple to only sparse areas, otherwise they canalized their workers. That happened when they opened the two other LA temples, Redlands and Newport. They lost 80% of their workers. And the patron lever dropped dramatically. It got so bad that they put Bakersfield in the LA temple district, even though they can drive two hours north on an uncrowded freeway to Fresno, they are forced to drive the same distance through the worst congested freeways in California.

Any new SC temples will not be built with xx miles of a “normal” temple.

[Corsair]

The only bright point about general conference is that I am hilariously entertained by what new craziness just might be said each April and October. I suppose I need to know what my believing friends and family will be excited about, but at least conference is so much more entertaining now that I don't believe.

[nibbler]

It goes something like this: If you think there are a lot of temples now, in 5 years they could more than double the number of temples. RMN is busy working on some new ideas and said "add a zero to the number of current temples".

159
+ 0
¯¯¯
159

Just saying.

[2bizE]

I can picture in my mind a neon sign out side of the Stake building saying:
Currently functioning as a: when if it a church, the word church lights up in Red. If it’s a temple, lights up in Blue.
Sort of like the Krispy Kreme sign when there are hot doughnuts.

[jfro18]

I can picture in my mind a neon sign out side of the Stake building saying:
Currently functioning as a: when if it a church, the word church lights up in Red. If it’s a temple, lights up in Blue.
Sort of like the Krispy Kreme sign when there are hot doughnuts.

Perfect!

[moksha]

...in 5 years they could more than double the number of temples.

Mini-Temples are a very doable thing. Could easily put one on a small lot in Des Moines, Iowa.

[1smartdodog]

A new rumor - guaranteed fresh and unique!!!

I heard from a friend of a friend of GA's assistant of someone in the same ward as.... you get the idea. So this is totally unsubstantiated, however, I think this is a good rumor and it almost passes the sniff test "Hey, this is actually in the realm of possibilities".

It goes something like this: If you think there are a lot of temples now, in 5 years they could more than double the number of temples. RMN is busy working on some new ideas and said "add a zero to the number of current temples".

My first reaction was WTH? Temples take many years to plan and build and dedicate. The TBM's might not be aware, but most of us are painfully aware that temples are very expensive and patron attendance is less than ideal. They could never double the number of temples with current practices in 5 years. That's exactly the point - they wouldn't do it with current practices. RMN is getting creative.

They already have approximately 2000+ buildings spread throughout the world that help get them to double the number of temples (or more) - Stake Centers. They could do some remodelling and dedicate part of a stake center to perform some of the responsibility of temples. Stake Centers are already interpreted as a satellite temple location when dedicating a temple. They already have a baptismal font. Many Stakes Centers are becoming underutilized.

It seems to make sense to me that this is in the realm of possibilities, much more so than allowing coffee or tea. They could give the appearance of ongoing revelation, spark interest in local meetinghouses with the remodels and ease the travel burdens on people with large geographic distances.

I think the flaw with this is more temples will just dilute attendance at the current ones. If it is true they have a hard time filling sessions at temples now how are more temples going to help?

Of course they could make temple attendance mandatory to have a temple recommend. Say once a month to keep your recommend. It would be like a perpetual motion machine, got to go to the temple so I can continue to go.

[w2mz]

A new rumor - guaranteed fresh and unique!!!

I heard from a friend of a friend of GA's assistant of someone in the same ward as.... you get the idea. So this is totally unsubstantiated, however, I think this is a good rumor and it almost passes the sniff test "Hey, this is actually in the realm of possibilities".

It goes something like this: If you think there are a lot of temples now, in 5 years they could more than double the number of temples. RMN is busy working on some new ideas and said "add a zero to the number of current temples".

My first reaction was WTH? Temples take many years to plan and build and dedicate. The TBM's might not be aware, but most of us are painfully aware that temples are very expensive and patron attendance is less than ideal. They could never double the number of temples with current practices in 5 years. That's exactly the point - they wouldn't do it with current practices. RMN is getting creative.

They already have approximately 2000+ buildings spread throughout the world that help get them to double the number of temples (or more) - Stake Centers. They could do some remodelling and dedicate part of a stake center to perform some of the responsibility of temples. Stake Centers are already interpreted as a satellite temple location when dedicating a temple. They already have a baptismal font. Many Stakes Centers are becoming underutilized.

It seems to make sense to me that this is in the realm of possibilities, much more so than allowing coffee or tea. They could give the appearance of ongoing revelation, spark interest in local meetinghouses with the remodels and ease the travel burdens on people with large geographic distances.

I think the flaw with this is more temples will just dilute attendance at the current ones. If it is true they have a hard time filling sessions at temples now how are more temples going to help?

Of course they could make temple attendance mandatory to have a temple recommend. Say once a month to keep your recommend. It would be like a perpetual motion machine, got to go to the temple so I can continue to go.

It will be interesting to see if the GAs back off the stories about poor people who save pennies for years, ride in beat up old busses for days, row across rivers and lakes in leaky boats, abandon even basic necessities of life, just to attend the temple even onetime. Those poor buggers will be pissed if they can now just go to their normal church that is now a part time temple. Why all the sacrifice if god was going to provide a way for them to go to the temple without all the misery?

[nibbler]

I think the flaw with this is more temples will just dilute attendance at the current ones. If it is true they have a hard time filling sessions at temples now how are more temples going to help?

One other potential issue is that the more temples there are the less special they will feel. Even orthodox members will cite this phenomenon during testimonies and talks. "When we had to drive 7 hours to the temple we went more than we do when the temple is 7 minutes down the road."

[Corsair]

New prediction from Twitter:

[jfro18]

The WoW rumors seem to be really hitting TBMs for this conference... I will be shocked if they allow coffee/tea, but I think it would be HILARIOUS if they do.

Personally I am hoping they remove the garment requirement, although I think DW would still wear them because it's all she knows.

Thankfully I have in town company this weekend to keep me busy... I'll follow along here but I'll be hopefully not posting until Sunday afternoon.

[Hermey]

They are going to wank on relentlessly about the miracle of the Rome Temple....wank wank wank...apostolic succession...wank wank wank...keys and bla bla bla...the Pope is nice but we are the champions...wank wank wank...Vatican has never known so much Priesthood authority ever...wank wank wank and collective morgasm.

Vomit.

I'll fix that for you.... "They are going to wank on relentlessly....(Aunt Wendy dons the testimony glove while the congregation sings Hold to the Rod)...wank wank wank...wank wank wank...wank wank wank...wank wank wank...and collective morgasm."

[DPRoberts]

The WoW rumors seem to be really hitting TBMs for this conference... I will be shocked if they allow coffee/tea, but I think it would be HILARIOUS if they do.

I think there might be an angle for modification of how Brighamites observe the WoW. It would be the fundamentalist angle. And it would seem to be consistent with what Rusty has done so far.

Think about RMN’s supposed “revelation” about the name of the church and where it comes from. It comes from the foundational revelations of eventhechurchofjesuchristoflatterdaysaints. A similar thing could be done with the WoW. Taking the WoW exactly as it states in the first three verses you get that 1) it is NOT a commandment, and 2) it is for the benefit of, and by extension only applies to, “saints” aka members.

1 A Word of Wisdom, for the benefit of the council of high priests, assembled in Kirtland, and the church, and also the saints in Zion—

2 To be sent greeting; not by commandment or constraint, but by revelation and the word of wisdom, showing forth the order and will of God in the temporal salvation of all saints in the last days—

3 Given for a principle with promise, adapted to the capacity of the weak and the weakest of all saints, who are or can be called saints.

All that needs to be done to give members more wiggle room with the WoW is to throw subsequent modern profits under the bus and observe the revelation as originally given. And RMN has already shown he’s willing to do that with his victory for Satan nonsense.

It could also benefit the public image of eventhechurchofjesuchristoflatterdaysaints if they would stop using their legislative arm to interfere in the agency of non-members. Too many Utah legislators think imposing the gospel on others is great public policy. Re-emphasizing that this is a word of wisdom only to the church might curb some of the extremism.

Then, of course, there is also this to be hopeful about

Nevertheless, wheat for man, and corn for the ox, and oats for the horse, and rye for the fowls and for swine, and for all beasts of the field, and barley for all useful animals, and for mild drinks, as also other grain.

[nibbler]

Think about RMN’s supposed “revelation” about the name of the church and where it comes from. It comes from the foundational revelations of eventhechurchofjesuchristoflatterdaysaints. A similar thing could be done with the WoW. Taking the WoW exactly as it states in the first three verses you get that 1) it is NOT a commandment, and 2) it is for the benefit of, and by extension only applies to, “saints” aka members.

That's a good point. It does feel like RMN likes to go back to strict literal/legalistic interpretations of founding scripture.

When is the church going to get a leader that's not afraid to write new scripture to make things happen?