General Conference Predictions

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Unendowed
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Unendowed »

Brent wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 7:47 am
Not Buying It wrote: Sat Sep 29, 2018 8:27 pm I really can’t figure out why anyone is taking the current Conference rumors any more seriously than the ones from years past that were wrong.
Why do people bet on football games or prognostigate about elections? It can be fun! Myself, I would gladly buy into an office pool about changes simply because it's truly a game of chance. It will doubtless be more of the same crap wearing a fabulous new wrapper like "Ministering" but what if the change is raising the age for female missions? Or announcing a temple in North Korea? Lighten up, have some fun. The return of wine, homemade of course, to the sacrament table would be cool. As would "spiritual wifery" in some form...
I think it's kind if fun to prognostigate as well. Now that I understand changes in the church has little to do with God's will and everything to with a bunch of old guys trying to stay relevant it's fun to guess what moves they make.

Here are my probabilities for the current predictions.

1. 2 hour church block - 90%
2. Change female missionary age to 18 - 40%
3. Allowing missionaries to serve shorter missions - 60%
4. Service only missions - 70%
5. Garmets only required in Temple - 2% 😫
6. Motab name change - dumb idea and really nobody cares
7. WoW changes - .0001%
Did I miss any?

I think the 2 hour block change finally happens. I think there will also definitely be some changes in the missionary program but can't pin down what exactly it will be. I actually think the shorter mission idea would work for kids these days. To an 18 year old, 2 years may as well be 10 years. 1 year seems more doable. Once you get them out there for several months you can guilt them into staying longer.
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Not Buying It
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Not Buying It »

Brent wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 7:47 am
Not Buying It wrote: Sat Sep 29, 2018 8:27 pm I really can’t figure out why anyone is taking the current Conference rumors any more seriously than the ones from years past that were wrong.
Why do people bet on football games or prognostigate about elections? It can be fun! Myself, I would gladly buy into an office pool about changes simply because it's truly a game of chance. It will doubtless be more of the same crap wearing a fabulous new wrapper like "Ministering" but what if the change is raising the age for female missions? Or announcing a temple in North Korea? Lighten up, have some fun. The return of wine, homemade of course, to the sacrament table would be cool. As would "spiritual wifery" in some form...
Well, yeah, having a guessing game for fun is one thing. But I am seeing some people online take these rumors way too seriously. Maybe after decades of being too gullible I should be more patient with those who evidence a little gullibility, but it is hard for me to see people buying into all these rumors without calling BS.
"The truth is elegantly simple. The lie needs complex apologia. 4 simple words: Joe made it up. It answers everything with the perfect simplicity of Occam's Razor. Every convoluted excuse withers." - Some guy on Reddit called disposazelph
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IT_Veteran
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by IT_Veteran »

Unendowed wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:33 am
6. Motab name change - dumb idea and really nobody cares
I think this is precisely why this one will change. He'll use the magic words before announcing it, of course, that the lord has revealed to him the new name. That makes it revelation for the lay membership. They're happy enough just to know that God is still speaking to him in some fashion. Being non-controversial is just icing on the cake.
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alas
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by alas »

IT_Veteran wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:21 am
Unendowed wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:33 am
6. Motab name change - dumb idea and really nobody cares
I think this is precisely why this one will change. He'll use the magic words before announcing it, of course, that the lord has revealed to him the new name. That makes it revelation for the lay membership. They're happy enough just to know that God is still speaking to him in some fashion. Being non-controversial is just icing on the cake.
I do think people care very deeply about the MoTab staying the MoTab. There are years of tradition and it didn’t change names when it moved to the conference center and never was the Mormon Conference Center Choir. You could just call that MC3. But no, they kept the traditional and familiar name. And I really can’t see them changing what has world wide recognition to go with some dumb TCOJCOLDS choir. Too long to write, doesn’t sound good, is not easily recognizable, and just not going to happen. Unless the church is run by PR idiots. Which is also possible.
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IT_Veteran
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by IT_Veteran »

alas wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:59 am
IT_Veteran wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:21 am
Unendowed wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:33 am
6. Motab name change - dumb idea and really nobody cares
I think this is precisely why this one will change. He'll use the magic words before announcing it, of course, that the lord has revealed to him the new name. That makes it revelation for the lay membership. They're happy enough just to know that God is still speaking to him in some fashion. Being non-controversial is just icing on the cake.
I do think people care very deeply about the MoTab staying the MoTab. There are years of tradition and it didn’t change names when it moved to the conference center and never was the Mormon Conference Center Choir. You could just call that MC3. But no, they kept the traditional and familiar name. And I really can’t see them changing what has world wide recognition to go with some dumb TCOJCOLDS choir. Too long to write, doesn’t sound good, is not easily recognizable, and just not going to happen. Unless the church is run by PR idiots. Which is also possible.
Fair, but their PR team is the same group that brought you these hashtags:

General Conference
#GeneralConference

Mormon Tabernacle Choir Music
#MoTab
#MessiahLive

They can't even go with #LDSConf anymore to actually provide context to it. And #MessiahLive? Really?
Kishkumen
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Kishkumen »

IT_Veteran wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:21 am
Unendowed wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:33 am
6. Motab name change - dumb idea and really nobody cares
I think this is precisely why this one will change. He'll use the magic words before announcing it, of course, that the lord has revealed to him the new name. That makes it revelation for the lay membership. They're happy enough just to know that God is still speaking to him in some fashion. Being non-controversial is just icing on the cake.
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Unendowed
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Unendowed »

alas wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:59 am
IT_Veteran wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:21 am
Unendowed wrote: Sun Sep 30, 2018 9:33 am
6. Motab name change - dumb idea and really nobody cares
I think this is precisely why this one will change. He'll use the magic words before announcing it, of course, that the lord has revealed to him the new name. That makes it revelation for the lay membership. They're happy enough just to know that God is still speaking to him in some fashion. Being non-controversial is just icing on the cake.
I do think people care very deeply about the MoTab staying the MoTab. There are years of tradition and it didn’t change names when it moved to the conference center and never was the Mormon Conference Center Choir. You could just call that MC3. But no, they kept the traditional and familiar name. And I really can’t see them changing what has world wide recognition to go with some dumb TCOJCOLDS choir. Too long to write, doesn’t sound good, is not easily recognizable, and just not going to happen. Unless the church is run by PR idiots. Which is also possible.
Agreed, the members care but outside the church nobody could give a rats a$$. That's why it would a really dumb idea to change possibly the only recognizable product the church produces that people actually like. A choir by any other name is just choir that happens to be really really really white.
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Unendowed
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Unendowed »

choir.jpg
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Brent
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Brent »

The New Coke Choir.

The choir formerly known as the Mormon tabernacle choir.

The "You know who" Tabernacle choir.
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Red Ryder
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Red Ryder »

Unendowed wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 5:07 pmchoir.jpg
Mormon BJ training session?

Yes, ban me for that please.
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by FiveFingerMnemonic »

Red Ryder wrote:
Unendowed wrote: Mon Oct 01, 2018 5:07 pmchoir.jpg
Mormon BJ training session?

Yes, ban me for that please.
Brazilian Jujitsu?
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Not Buying It
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Not Buying It »

Here’s a conference prediction. The Brethren will stress following the Brethren even more than usual. There will be vague and general references to dissidents and how they are doing Satan’s work without mentioning Sam Young by name and without referring to what he was protesting. There will be talks about dealing with doubts without ever discussing what prompts those doubts. And those talks will emphasize that the best way to resolve those doubts is to do Mormon things until you believe in Mormonism. And afterwards members will claim they were so inspired but will be secretly disappointed they didn’t cut the three hour block to a two hour block.
"The truth is elegantly simple. The lie needs complex apologia. 4 simple words: Joe made it up. It answers everything with the perfect simplicity of Occam's Razor. Every convoluted excuse withers." - Some guy on Reddit called disposazelph
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2bizE
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by 2bizE »

I predict that guessing what may happen or what we want to happen at GC is much more therapeutic than actually watching GC.
~2bizE
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alas
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by alas »

2bizE wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 7:44 am I predict that guessing what may happen or what we want to happen at GC is much more therapeutic than actually watching GC.
I never thought about how the speculation like this is therapeutic, but it is like little kids play acting to help them cope with real life. We can voice our secret hopes and fears in a safe environment because it is just wondering what might happen at conference, not saying to our spouse, “The three hours of church suck.” At which our TBM spouse gets angry and tightens down on making sure we don’t slip out and go to Starbucks during third hour.
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Emower
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Emower »

alas wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 8:39 am
2bizE wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 7:44 am I predict that guessing what may happen or what we want to happen at GC is much more therapeutic than actually watching GC.
I never thought about how the speculation like this is therapeutic, but it is like little kids play acting to help them cope with real life. We can voice our secret hopes and fears in a safe environment because it is just wondering what might happen at conference, not saying to our spouse, “The three hours of church suck.” At which our TBM spouse gets angry and tightens down on making sure we don’t slip out and go to Starbucks during third hour.
The 2 hour church rumor is hilarious to me. As if a 2 hour church block still stuck in the middle of the day, still talking about the same kinds of mind-numbing stuff is any better? It seems like me saying "hey, my prostate exam went from 3 hours to only 2 now! Yay!"
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by wtfluff »

alas wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 8:39 am
2bizE wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 7:44 am I predict that guessing what may happen or what we want to happen at GC is much more therapeutic than actually watching GC.
I never thought about how the speculation like this is therapeutic, but it is like little kids play acting to help them cope with real life. We can voice our secret hopes and fears in a safe environment because it is just wondering what might happen at conference, not saying to our spouse, “The three hours of church suck.” At which our TBM spouse gets angry and tightens down on making sure we don’t slip out and go to Starbucks during third hour.
Is it really therapeutic when we get our hopes up, only to have them completely dashed with the same tired old rhetoric from the Q15?

I can't help but hope that they'll change "stuff" to make things better for my believing family members (which will also be better for me) but a bunch of old, out of touch white guys with their heads stuck in the 50's seem to be incapable of doing that... :(

But... Re-Branding LDS-Inc. AGAIN... That is very, very, very important!
Faith does not give you the answers, it just stops you asking the questions. -Frater Ravus

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alas
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by alas »

wtfluff wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 10:03 am
alas wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 8:39 am
2bizE wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 7:44 am I predict that guessing what may happen or what we want to happen at GC is much more therapeutic than actually watching GC.
I never thought about how the speculation like this is therapeutic, but it is like little kids play acting to help them cope with real life. We can voice our secret hopes and fears in a safe environment because it is just wondering what might happen at conference, not saying to our spouse, “The three hours of church suck.” At which our TBM spouse gets angry and tightens down on making sure we don’t slip out and go to Starbucks during third hour.
Is it really therapeutic when we get our hopes up, only to have them completely dashed with the same tired old rhetoric from the Q15?

I can't help but hope that they'll change "stuff" to make things better for my believing family members (which will also be better for me) but a bunch of old, out of touch white guys with their heads stuck in the 50's seem to be incapable of doing that... :(

But... Re-Branding LDS-Inc. AGAIN... That is very, very, very important!
Is anyone really getting their hopes up? Or is it like kids playing doctor, where they don’t really expect the doctor to not give them a shot next time, but by pretending to BE the doctor, they kind of take control. We are kind of saying, “well if I was the prophet, I would change the 3 hour block.” We are pretending to be in control even though we know it is going to be the Same. Old. Crap.
consiglieri
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by consiglieri »

I think there is an off-chance President Nelson will present the Proclamation to the World on the Family as a new Official Declaration in the Doctrine and Covenants.

Or maybe even Section 139 . . .
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Unendowed
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by Unendowed »

At this point I think it would be hilarious if the 2 hour block change doesn't happen. I live in possibly the most TBM densely populated area in the world and this rumor is being thrown around like it's a done deal. If it doesn't happen there are going to be some very disappointed people around here.
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2bizE
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Re: General Conference Predictions

Post by 2bizE »

consiglieri wrote: Tue Oct 02, 2018 10:57 am I think there is an off-chance President Nelson will present the Proclamation to the World on the Family as a new Official Declaration in the Doctrine and Covenants.

Or maybe even Section 139 . . .
If so, I wonder if the section header will include a summary about the proclamation being part of a Amicus brief to the Supreme Court of Hawaii.
~2bizE
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