Just thanks, and here I am officially

[TheRoadSouth]

Greetings to the group of people who have helped me more than anything else has over the last few months, while I try (valiantly, I might add - I was one of those really awesome spirits in the pre-mortal realm) to reconstruct my failth into something that allows me to have this new, better, more charitable worldview without (I hesitate to use the word "bondage" of being orthodox in the church, but it did feel like that a lot to me) but without being a near-slave to the obedience checklists. And, I don't really want to give up my community. These are my best friends, my family, and I love them and understand where they are more completely now. It's unbelievably wierd, almost surreal, being on the outside looking in. I somehow find myself an active, temple-recommend holding priesthood holder who, at least right now, is almost totally unbelieving in the foundational claims of the church. Yet, I love church, the community, being able to serve and help people, and generally in all the foundational good that the church seeks to accomplish in the world.

Still, dang. Just considering leaving the church: the family implications, the social and business complications (I'm a CEO who is very active in my community, and well-known to be LDS), and yet I feel like my mind has just been set free, like a HUGE burden, just lifted, by realizing that I now own 100% of my thoughts, actions, and decisions. It's really mind-blowingly awesome. But the baggage. Again, dang.

I'll probably be hanging out here for a while. My thoughts are all over the place right now. Is that common?

TRS

[Linked]

Welcome to NOM!

It is very common to have your thoughts and emotions bounce all over the place. This is a great place to celebrate or commiserate as the occasion demands.

[slavereeno]

Welcome, I concur with linked.

I am still on the roller coaster myself, so I can empathize with your feelings.

[moksha]

Welcome, TheRoadSouth. It might help you right now to focus on what good things the Church does and its potential to add something positive to the world. Perhaps in some small way, you could help be a change agent in encouraging the Church to do better.

[Ghost]

Welcome to the forum. I can relate to your desire to maintain ties to the community, not disrupt family, and so on. It's a strange thing to find yourself going through significant changes in perspective and having to decide what to change outwardly, if anything. Common advice people give is to move slowly, but there isn't likely a perfect approach that fits everyone.

[IT_Veteran]

I sympathize with a lot of what you're feeling. When I was struggling in my own testimony I accepted a calling as the elders quorum president (never turn down a calling!) and was still in it a year later when my testimony was completely gone. It's hard to be expected to preach and teach when you don't believe anymore.

My DW has been very supportive of my transition out of Mormonism, but it hasn't been easy for either of us. This has been a great place to come and find support, ask questions, learn new things, and just vent sometimes.

[Corsair]

We are glad you found us! By the way, how did you find us? What sequence of web searches or links or references or rumors led you to this website?

[TheRoadSouth]

We are glad you found us! By the way, how did you find us? What sequence of web searches or links or references or rumors led you to this website?

I found StayLDS first, and have been lurking and posting some there. NOM was mentioned in a post there. Lately I’ve been reading lots of posts here, and find myself relating well to thoughts shared here. Its a nice feeling to know I’m not alone.

[Hagoth]

I found StayLDS first, and have been lurking and posting some there. NOM was mentioned in a post there. Lately I’ve been reading lots of posts here, and find myself relating well to thoughts shared here. Its a nice feeling to know I’m not alone.

That's exactly how I found NOM, way back when. Nice to have you on board. I hope we'll all become great friends.

[FiveFingerMnemonic]

Welcome, a great analogy that was given here before is that if you are driving 80mph down the road with your family in the car and try to shift into reverse suddenly, something is bound to break in the transmission. Same goes for participation in the church, best to just slowly slip your foot off the gas and coast for awhile while you figure out what exit to take, if at all.