Missionaries teaching son behind my back

[Just This Guy]

My kids spent the afternoon at my parents. After I got home, DS told us that my parents had the sister missionaries to start teaching him (age 9) this discussions. This was without either DW's or my permission or knowledge. They even went as far as to schedule a 2nd discussion. Needless to say DW was livid when we found out.

We tried asking DM for the sister's phone number to call and let them know that DS was not interested in further discussions. DM made excuse after sexcuse why she couldn't give it. We then asked them to e-mail us last Sunday's program and we could take it from there. (DF makes them in Word each week.) Despite DF sitting at the computer, they couldn't do that. DW ended up having to call the bishop to let him know that we did not give permission and needed it to stop. I will give DS credit that he told the sisters that he wasn't interested in baptism right now.

I made a point to let DM know that any further discussions would result in my contacting the mission office directly.

Best we can figure, DM lied to the missionaries, hence why she didn't want us talking to them.

[Give It Time]

My kids spent the afternoon at my parents. After I got home, DS told us that my parents had the sister missionaries to start teaching him (age 9) this discussions. This was without either DW's or my permission or knowledge. They even went as far as to schedule a 2nd discussion. Needless to say DW was livid when we found out.

We tried asking DM for the sister's phone number to call and let them know that DS was not interested in further discussions. DM made excuse after sexcuse why she couldn't give it. We then asked them to e-mail us last Sunday's program and we could take it from there. (DF makes them in Word each week.) Despite DF sitting at the computer, they couldn't do that. DW ended up having to call the bishop to let him know that we did not give permission and needed it to stop. I will give DS credit that he told the sisters that he wasn't interested in baptism right now.

I made a point to let DM know that any further discussions would result in my contacting the mission office directly.

Best we can figure, DM lied to the missionaries, hence why she didn't want us talking to them.

You know how people say Mormons are their people, their tribe?

If you go to church, start paying attention to conversion stories and listen to how surprisingly aggressive the church is. Listen to and observe how aggressive they are about keeping people in the fold. I've experienced, personally, behavior that borders on the illegal in this aggression. Your minor son being taught about any religion without your awareness and consent is against the law. I've heard of people breaking into friends houses and waking them up to take them to church. I'm sure there are more. Do we ever hear, after these stories, some sort of reprimand from the presiding authority about drawing the line at illegal behavior? No. It either stands or we have been "well taught".

Aggression isn't a good trait to be fostering, nurturing, teaching over the pulpit. This acceptance, encouragement and culture of aggressive behavior is why I no longer say Mormons are my tribe, my people.

[2bizE]

My kids spent the afternoon at my parents. After I got home, DS told us that my parents had the sister missionaries to start teaching him (age 9) this discussions. This was without either DW's or my permission or knowledge. They even went as far as to schedule a 2nd discussion. Needless to say DW was livid when we found out.

We tried asking DM for the sister's phone number to call and let them know that DS was not interested in further discussions. DM made excuse after sexcuse why she couldn't give it. We then asked them to e-mail us last Sunday's program and we could take it from there. (DF makes them in Word each week.) Despite DF sitting at the computer, they couldn't do that. DW ended up having to call the bishop to let him know that we did not give permission and needed it to stop. I will give DS credit that he told the sisters that he wasn't interested in baptism right now.

I made a point to let DM know that any further discussions would result in my contacting the mission office directly.

Best we can figure, DM lied to the missionaries, hence why she didn't want us talking to them.

This is terrible they go behind your back. You should have them read up on the November LGBT policy for kids. It no longer even matters if they get baptized before 18 anyway.
My favorite part of your story was your DM making excuse after sexcuse. Mrs. 2bizE frequently makes sexcuses as well.

[Silver Girl]

Good for your DW, for calling the bishop to report it. Maybe a call to the MP would be in order, too.

I can't believe how intrusive family members can be - a friend of mine is married to a never-mo, and she recently got fed up and stopped attending. Their HS-age daughter has lost interest in the church and rarely wants to go. She is supposed to visit grandma during spring break, and grandma has lined up a bunch of churchy activities for her that will take the entire weekend (baptisms for the dead, YW activities, sacrament, etc.). Grandma did not check with the parents on her plans. Needless to say, the daughter is NOT looking forward to all that TBM "Fun." I envision a tough time in the next few years as a battle forms over whether or not the daughter can make her own choices.

[Brent]

This is an "up the tree" issue. Bypass your family and directly go to the Mission President. Let him know where you stand and that you're willing to ask for a restraining order if the missionaries meet with your MINOR child again. The Grandparents have ZERO rights, if they took your child to the hospital they couldn't get surgery for them, they can't enroll them in schools--they have no rights. The Mission President should realize this. If the MP doesn't make you happy email the Area Authority and CC all the media you can find.

Something WILL happen.

[Just This Guy]

I let my parents know that any further discussion would result in my contacting the Mission office and president directly.

I am curious what the laws are for something like this.

[Red Ryder]

My favorite part of your story was your DM making excuse after sexcuse. Mrs. 2bizE frequently makes sexcuses as well.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh how the Young Women's lessons seep in deep!

[Mormorrisey]

I've never understood this - it's as if some members have no concept on how ordinary people react to this nonsense. What happens if THEIR relative started having JW meetings behind their back? They'd freak, and rightly so. But they have no compunction on doing similar behaviour because it's "the one true church." You handled this appropriately and quickly; you needed to nip this in the bud. Well done.

[Give It Time]

This is an "up the tree" issue. Bypass your family and directly go to the Mission President. Let him know where you stand and that you're willing to ask for a restraining order if the missionaries meet with your MINOR child again. The Grandparents have ZERO rights, if they took your child to the hospital they couldn't get surgery for them, they can't enroll them in schools--they have no rights. The Mission President should realize this. If the MP doesn't make you happy email the Area Authority and CC all the media you can find.

Something WILL happen.

This. Absolutely.

[Give It Time]

I let my parents know that any further discussion would result in my contacting the Mission office and president directly.

I am curious what the laws are for something like this.

I don't know. I just know that the divorce process made me very aware of parental rights and responsibilities under the law. This is a definite violation of parental rights. I suggest a quick session with a lawyer to correctly, definitively and completely answer your question.

[Lithium Sunset]

Mrs. 2bizE frequently makes sexcuses as well.

oh my gosh... I'm still laughing.

This happened to me when I was young... I can't remember exactly how old I was... 13? My parents were inactive, I don't think they had taken their names off yet, and what was supposed to be a day with grandma turned into my first(ambush) discussion. The two missionaries kept telling me I felt the spirit. It was really off-putting.... too bad I gave another set of missionaries a chance to make up for it a few years later.

Ugh, sorry this happened Just This Guy. So rude and inappropriate and what makes it worse is that it's family.

[Newme]

I let my parents know that any further discussion would result in my contacting the Mission office and president directly.

I am curious what the laws are for something like this.

Yeah, I'm curious too. My first thought was if you were willingly leaving your kids in the care of your parents, you were entrusting them to do with your kids what they thought was best for them medically, religiously etc.

My mom went behind 2 of my sisters' backs to show them things that their moms (my sisters) specifically asked her not to. One was the Book of Mormon. All they could do (I guess) was get mad at her. I suppose they could have sued her but that would just be more of a head ache and cause more problems.

They, and I, have learned the need for boundaries with pushy, disrespectful people like that.

[Just This Guy]

My favorite part of your story was your DM making excuse after sexcuse. Mrs. 2bizE frequently makes sexcuses as well.

Ha ha ha ha ha. Oh how the Young Women's lessons seep in deep!

The irony is the DW, the English professor, read through my initial post before I submitted it and we both missed that one.